We recommend you use the following guidelines:

• Be certain. Mean what you say. Be stern and serious.
• Correct with love. Talk to your child the way you want your child to talk to you. For example, "I am sorry you left the yard but now you must stay in the house." Avoid yelling.
• Precede punishment by one warning or reminder.
• With aggressive behavior, redirect your child for clear intent. For example, intervene when your child raises his hand to hit a friend.
• Apply punishment immediately. Do not say, "Wait until your father gets home and he will punish you." Children forget what they are being punished for when they are punished at a later time.
• Make a one-sentence statement about your rule during correction. For example, "The rule is to clean the den when you are finished playing."
• Ignore your child's arguments during correction.
• Make punishment brief. Toys should be out of circulation briefly, an hour a day. Timeout is one minute per year of life.
• Keep the punishment in proportion to the behavior. Follow the punishment by trust. Accept your child back into the family circle and do not talk about the misbehavior.
• Direct the punishment against the misbehavior, not the person. For example, rather than send your child to his room for throwing a toy across the room, remove the toy.
• Don't be surprised if the incidence of bad behavior increases at first. Children who are out of control often go through a testing phase before they comply.